Beneath Contempt

It's been almost a month now since I've been placed on administrative leave with out pay (LWOP) after refusing to submit to this illegal, immoral, and unethical clot shot mandate edict, issued by the Trudeau government.  During this time, I've had a lot of time to reflect on many aspects of my career and, particularly, where it's taken me and where I intend to go from here.

Suffice to say, I think I'm pretty much done with law enforcement work in the sense that I'll ever be returning to duty.  I think I may have said this in a previous post, but it bears repeating here.  I just don't think I can go back to what I did before with the same attitude that I had prior to all this coming down.  

It's not that I was naive - in all my many years working in and being exposed to the immense stupidity that seems to be inherent in public service work, I had the opportunity to see firsthand the depths to which many public servants (especially management) can sink.  Deep down, I think I always suspected that my mettle would be tested by having to go up against them, even though I went out of my way to focus on my duties and, really, just earn an honest day's pay for an honest day's work.  But in that, I don't think any thing really prepares a person for the day when the curtain comes down and you get to see, once and for all, what you REALLY amount to, in the eyes of those you serve.

I always knew that my efforts didn't amount to jack shit.  After my 25 or 30 or however long I could tolerate the endless slew of bullshit that is part and parcel to working for a law enforcement agency (or any government department, really), I'd be maybe given a lame retirement party and a shitty plaque then be promptly shown the door.  In a week, nobody would remember I existed.  I never had a problem with that.

No, for me, the issue is that I don't think I can take any of it seriously anymore.  Whether it's the grossly inadequate and incompetent 'leadership', the constant acceptance of lowered expectations and half-assed work being passed off as 'first rate', or the so-called 'core values' which we're supposed to live and breathe and are supposed to be reflected in everything we say or do, in the end, I realize once and for all that it's all just bullshit.

So for me, in my heart and soul, I can't do it anymore.  I am not quitting my job right now due to legal and personal circumstances, but in essence, I have no intentions of returning to work in this field ever again.  A year ago, not only would I have never pictured myself saying that, but I never even fathomed the circumstances that would cause me to say something like that.

I would, however, like to take this opportunity to extend a hearty 'fuck you' to all my co-workers whom I've come across over the years who willfully and zealously 'bent the knee' and complied with the mandate.  I'm NOT talking about the people who were coerced and blackmailed into getting the shot because you were put in a position where you had no other choice.  It's, in large part, for you that I continue to fight on and not give in - your sacrifices should not be in vain and the people responsible for this should be held to account.

I'm talking about the kool-aid swilling company men/women who, in their own smug and pompous manner, bent over and willingly took it up the ass for the company that no more gives a shit about them than it does me or anyone else.  I'm talking about the assholes who arrogantly demand that everyone out there submit to this tyrannical mandate and deem, from atop their high horse, that anyone who doesn't comply deserves to be treated as ruthlessly and viciously as circumstances allow.

You fucking people.  All you did was prove that you, and the force you serve, is only as good as your masters allow you to be.  You proved that, in spite of any trite and banal apologies for past wrongdoings, you'll step up to the plate and continue these very same misdeeds under the pretense of 'following orders'.  And most importantly, you proved to me that you do not give a good God damn about the public you serve, only your own self interests.  You sold your soul, your balls, and helped forfeit the rights and freedoms of people in the entire country you swore an oath to serve and protect, for a fucking paycheck.  You proved your 'core values' and 'ethics' are nothing more than a terrible joke.  In my eyes, each and every one of you are traitors.  Should you never face justice in this lifetime; should the evil forces you are actively aiding who are leading the world into tyranny and despair prevail, I truly hope there is a special place in Hell for each and every one of you.  You deserve it, and you can be rest assured that I will be waiting for you there.

I think that, above all else, is the main reason I can't put on my uniform again.  It's not just abstracts like the image, or freedom, or rights, or liberties.  People go to war for these things, yes.  But they fight for the people in the trench next to them.  But this experience has really caused me to lose pretty much all manner of reverence for some of the people I was in the trenches with.  They aren't people I trust and respect enough that I would put my life in their hands.

It's a truly disgusting state of affairs, to be sure.  But unfortunately, I don't know if there's any going back.  As those loathsome bastards who engineered this entire matter like to say, this is the 'new normal'.

Comments

  1. It's so unfortunate that people are losing their careers over this vile bullshit disguised as a health emergency. But you have hit upon the core of it all. A lot of the people you work for and with are empty suits that will mouth the oaths, but bend over for a paycheck when push comes to shove. I empathize with the position you find yourself in. If all it all means is just a paycheck, we're all truly fucked. No one is coming to save us. We're on our own.

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    1. Sadly, you're right Chuck. All this scamdemic has done is expose the truth that's been there all along. None of us wanted to see that, even though I think most critical thinkers suspected it to be true.

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  2. You should try practicing medicine....it's about as much fun

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    1. I don't envy you guys in the medical field at all. You guys are at ground zero of this shit storm.

      The toll nurses and doctors are paying in terms of mental health as a result of this will be immeasurable.

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  3. Unfortunately this battle has just begun. Thank you for taking a stand for truth, it means a lot to those of us out here who believe in truth, integrity, and righteousness. Traits that most of the herd do not adhere to. I feel your pain, and my heart hangs heavy seeing all the evil atrocities going on around the globe under the guise of this medical b.s.

    Gives me hope when I read about people like you. Almost everyone I know has bent the knee. They are bowing down to the wrong master. Peace and blessings to you and yours!

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  4. I am old enough to remember when the RCMP in my small town were literally rock stars. We mobbed them as kids, and wanted to be just like them. I thought the sun rose and set on them, and set my watch and warrant to them well into my late 30s.

    I have to watch my yap on the internet... but I am glad you're out. The Mounties are taking the wrong orders from the wrong people and most of them know it - and do it anyway. There is going to be a reckoning, and a lot of good people are probably going to get hurt. I saw the vids on those two Albertan preachers out here that got busted for not shutting their churches down, and I swear - I could see the shame and sadness in the body language of the officers involved.

    Yesterday on Blab I watched the Australians tangle with their riot police. They caught a few officers, tore their helmets off, and beat the daylights out of them. When the others tried to retreat, the mob threw the helmets at them and set off after them. More cops dragged down and thumped. I hate to say it... but those men had it coming. You can't treat people like that and expect them to take it.

    I am glad there are still officers like you around, regardless of your duty status.

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    1. Thanks Glen. I appreciate the comments. How long me, and others like me, are allowed to exist remains to be seen. While it's becoming more clear this mandate is more a politically motivated purge of 'undesirables', what everyone else does about it is anyone's guess.

      I grew up around mounties, having been raised in rural Alberta. It was something I always wanted to do. I liked being a mountie, but the organization is a mess beyond repair. The academy is even worse. It was a gong show when I was there a few years ago (I jumped ship from another agency) and it's gotten worse.

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  5. More and more, the institutions we looked to as examples to emulate are being revealed as complete lies from their beginnings. It began with sports stars being shown to be just as human and flawed as those they, for a time, rose above. Since then, one idol after another has fallen as far, or farther.
    To discover, for example, that a sizeable proportion of doctors are on the take from the pharmaceutical companies, and that their judgement is therefore suspect at a minimum, is to undo a lifetime of faith in the incorruptible nature of those who take the Hippocratic oath. To find out that oath means little, and won't be defended or abided by, is to wonder what else lies beneath the rock...
    We are truly on our own. The institutions are corrupt. It comes down to individuals within them, deciding on their own to behave one way or another, when the walls begin to truly come down.
    There is no one coming to save us. We shall shortly find that the only light left, will be that which we shine upon each other.

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    1. That last part is great. It's actually the last piece of advice I gave to people on my last day of duty, before I got stood down: take care of yourself and your own.

      It's a dog eat dog world, so it's imperative you do everything you can to avoid eating your own.

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  6. I just finished reading a post from a blogger that I used to have a lot of respect for. He just got his second booster jab and reported that is was "No big deal". It is disappointing to see how easily people who are reasonably intelligent and Internet savvy can be persuaded to ignore the warnings and just follow the herd. Thanks for expressing your courage to do the right thing. We will need more leadership like yours in the days to come. The most dangerous crowd, as this thing unfolds, is going to be the military. How many of them remember, or even acknowledge their oath of enlistment? Too many are going to be "just following orders".

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    1. Thanks UO. I plan to fight this to the end, even if I'm the last guy standing.

      As for the military? I'd like to think there are people in the forces, especially SOF types, who had a line they weren't willing to cross. But honestly, it's hard to say. Fault lines are being drawn.

      Even still, 'following orders' does NOT cut the mustard with me. The day they come hunting for my family, they'd best say goodbye to theirs first.

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  7. Take some solace in the fact that you are not the only one. Twenty seven years ago we assumed $80Kstudent loans to put my wife through med school while I swung a hammer to pay the rent so that one day when my body could no longer handle the physical demands she cold carry the weight. After twenty five years of service she was deemed undesirable unless she complied with the clot-shot mandate. We saw the writing on the wall and opted to get out of the fray while we still could. Not our monkey not our circus. She had been until then the highest revenue generating senior PT for the company. We were lucky we lived very frugally and had just paid off the note on the house and had squirreled enough to live off should it all turn pear shaped as we feared some day it would. Suffice to say there has been a twenty percent attrition rate in the medical field here in Maine right across the board. But now they are screaming that the hospitals are overwhelmed and can't cope.

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    1. I think it was Thomas Jefferson who said "I'm a firm believer in luck and I find the harder I work, the more I have of it".

      I'd say you and your missus personify that quote pretty well.

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  8. My Father stated it rather well. "I was just tired of the bullshit". That phrase still stuck in my head all these many years. I was tired of the bullshit as well and basically forced into retirement. No one wants to hire a 53 year old back then. I said fook it, let them have their low wage, low skilled, low intensity, unreliable employe. The shit show has been glorious to watch even with all the blessings I was bestowed since that day.

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  9. PLEAE DO NOT W
    AIT IN HELL GO TO HEAVEN WHERE YOU WILL NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN

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    1. That won't be up to me, Deb. Besides, someone's gotta keep the bastards in line down there and I wouldn't mind the job.

      Merry Christmas!

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